Searched for Beauty in Islam and Found Things That Broke My Faith
23 Nov. 2000
I have a friend who doesn't believe in any religion, always talked about humanity and wanted to form a group of humanity. I followed Islam and knew all the good things of Islam. Whatever laws I found in Islam, I gave a good explanation and everyone was amazed including me. I ignored all those verses, hadiths which seemed bad to me and thought I couldn't understand probably. I am a person who loves to do the right thing and not for showing. So I tried to know the Islam to practice it better and then the problem arise. I couldn't believe what I found. I asked Muslim scholars, seniors and I tried to find out the truth. I actually didn't believe there could be any mean thing in Islam. I asked myself whether God can be so mean. If God is The Power who created EVERYTHING, could He be so mean. I asked people why prophet married so many, why he married his adopted sons wife etc. None gave me any answer which could satisfy me. One of them told me that why am I so eager to find out there is no God or prophet lied and all these. I actually didn't want to find out there is no God but his comment gave me a clue.
I really believed all there is in Islam is truth and I hoped for the judgment day. I thought only God knows who a person really is, I believed humanity is the main identity of human being and on judgment day God will send them to heaven. You won't believe how wonderful explanation I had about hell and heaven, prayer, fasting and every thing was in Koran. Still I can't believe these are not true. The much I read I wonder how is it possible to make so many people such idiot! I am no one but I know many who are really scholars, highly educated, why didn't they understand anything, why?
Oh I wanted to find the beauty of Islam so that I can be a proper human being, treat others right and teach others the right thing with the laws of God. But I found things, which broke my faith.
Is this why Mollah's tells us not to question, if you don't understand leave it on God, when God wants He will give you the wisdom. I have found that those who actually don't follow anything of Islam (not even anything of humanity) but act as a pure Muslim, try to hide the truth from everyone. They don't want people to know the truth, what Islam is , who really the prophet was and never answers the questions against Islam. It is really a good politics, the best politics to use the religion as shield and take all the unethical advantages.
I am so frustrated, so shocked, and have none to discuss this (people will kill me). Hope I will get answer from you, whoever you are. Suggest me something, some more books, examples, ancient history's before Mosses (so that I can know for sure that they were real or myth), and if possible mental support that I am not doing anything wrong. I was brought up as Muslim so it's not easy to free from guilt if I deny everything. The best thing would be time machine so I could go back that time and see whether Gabrielle came with Koran or not and if not ........hope it proves my mental state at this moment. Please reply my mail. Thank you very much for your time.
Everyday more people realize that religions were not given to us by a deity called God. They are the inventions of primitive men and were born out of fear and ignorance. Just as children think that every bad thing that happens to them is because they have been naughty, primitive people felt that powerful forces that controlled their lives, like diseases and natural disasters were the chastisement of a god because they sinned.
A child sees himself as the center of universe. He interprets all that happens in his life as the consequence of his actions. Often children blame themselves if there is a fight between the parents. If a parent die they think that it is their fault, and find extremely unreasonable excuses to blame themselves for that. They believe that they are being punished because they stole a cookie, because they lied or because they played with their genitals in secret.
The psyche of humankind is the same of an individual that composes it. Humanity goes through the same stages of infancy, childhood, adolescence and adulthood. In the earlier stages of our mental development, we thought and acted like children. We invented gods as our invisible parents, because we needed their protection. But at the same time, just like children we blamed it on ourselves if ominous things happened to us that were beyond our control. Gods became our custodian angels and our moral police.
This element of fear and this need to believe was used by shamans, medicine men and by witches who claimed to be the mediums between gods and people. Some called themselves prophets and messengers of gods. Every nation had its own god who was their patron, and every god had its own prophets. The present day religions are the evolutions of those primitive beliefs. Those who call themselves prophets are but unscrupulous cons and swindlers who themselves lived very unholy lives and took advantage of our gullibility and played with our fears. They presented NO proof to their claims. They warned us against doubt, disdained human intelligence, avoided questions, praised fanatical belief and demanded blind faith.
These “billy goat” charlatans, as Mohammad Zakaria Ar Razi, disparagingly calls them, had no knowledge of this world nor had any clue of the subtleties of the mystical and divine reality. All their scientific observations about the universe and the creation have proven to be false. How can we trust them to know anything about the spiritual world?
The world without the ignorance imparted by religion would be a better world. Morality does not derive from religion. It is a human faculty. Rejection of religion and their petulant god also does not mean rejection of the Divine. As Pierre Tielhard de Chardin said, we are spiritual beings, having a physical experience. There is a divine reality within each one of us, but it has nothing to do with god and his comical puppet-show called religion. God is a reality, not a being. It is the underlying principle of the creation. We don’t need religions to be good and we don’t need their imaginary god to gain spiritual insight into the divine and mystical reality that encompasses all things.
As of your fear of being killed, they are well founded. It is vital that you keep your thoughts to yourself and NEVER discuss them with anyone. You can only express your thoughts online and never reveal your true identity. Muhammad used to kill those who turned their backs to him and his followers have done so for 1400 years. One day the sun of truth will break through the darkness of ignorance and we all can come out of our closets and speak freely without fearing for our lives. But let us work together and let us make that day come sooner. Let us stop this insanity that has ruined the lives of millions of people for thousands of years.
This letter was sent to Ali Sina, founder of Faith Freedom